Yes, I’m another one of those people who watched Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead on Netflix and decided to undergo a life-changing, world-shaking 3 day juice cleanse. For three solid days I didn’t eat a single thing and lived on some pretty questionable homemade juices and water, all in the name of my health (and a flatter stomach). Here’s what happened when I underwent my 3 day juice cleanse.
Day 1
Who knew juicing could be such a palaver? Despite getting up twenty minutes early to make my breakfast and lunch juices, I still ended up running out of the apartment ten minutes late, leaving behind a kitchen smeared from top to bottom with pulp. To add insult to injury, my first green juice tasted so terrible that I almost threw it straight back up.
Things weren’t exactly looking up by lunchtime. I had a pounding headache and I was so hungry that I would have sold my soul for a bag of fries if the opportunity had presented itself. I looked down at 1:15 and inspected my stomach. Still not flat!
After work, I made another trip to the supermarket to stock up on another 15 tonnes of fruits and vegetables. Honestly, you could run a small elephant sanctuary on what I’ve bought for tomorrow’s juices. Amazingly, the sight of actual food and the smell of fresh bread didn’t push me over the edge into a state of insanity. I suppose it’s all about the small victories in that sense.
That said, six hour long headache and stomach cramps aside, this is nowhere near as painful as I’d expected. A lot of people recommend doing a juice cleanse over the weekend so you can lay in bed all day and feel suitably sorry for yourself, but being at work was a great distraction. I was so busy that I barely even noticed how miserable I was. Of course, all that changed when I got home, collapsed into bed and…well, began feeling suitably sorry for myself.
Thank goodness I’m only doing this juice cleanse for three days. The only thing keeping me going at this point is knowing that tomorrow I’ll already be at the the halfway mark!
Day 2
Well, I’m certainly not my best self today. The headache has finally gone and I’m not even hungry anymore (honestly, at this point I think if I tried to eat something I’d be physically sick), but I feel like someone snuck into my room while I was asleep last night and drained all the life out of me.
Part of me is concerned that the cleanse has triggered all the symptoms of my anaemia. My lips are chapped, my fingers are numb, I barely have enough energy to keep myself upright and the brain fog has well and truly descended. I must be getting enough iron though! I’m drinking spinach by the glassful! I wouldn’t be surprised if I woke up tomorrow, looked in the mirror and saw Popeye staring back at me.
After trip number three to the supermarket, I’ve settled in for an early night. It’s 6:05pm.
I’ve pre-chopped all my veggies for tomorrow morning to spare myself the drama of trying to do it all at 5am. I’ve completely given up on following the recipes. They all taste overwhelmingly of celery as far as I’m concerned so what difference does it make?
I’m glad tomorrow is the last morning I’ll have to spend wading through pulp.
Day 3
The overwhelming exhaustion continues. Other than my nagging desire to nap at my desk all day and the occasional hunger pangs, I’m actually not feeling too bad today. It’s amazing how quickly my body adapted to not having any food. Unfortunately, I still don’t look like a Victoria’s Secret model, nor are my skin and hair looking particularly radiant. The calorie restriction and vitamin overload don’t appear to have done much of anything expect make me hungry.
After a sudden burst of energy early in the evening (which could definitely just be hysteria), I’ve ended up in bed by 7pm. I’m definitely excited to eat some solid food tomorrow, but knowing that I have to reacclimatise my body by sticking to fruits and vegetables all day is kind of daunting. I just want to stuff my face with an entire loaf of bread and a pizza. Clearly the fast has not curbed any of my carb cravings.
Conclusion
The big question is, was it worth it in the end? Honestly, I’m not sure that it was. I expected to come off my juice cleanse feeling rejuvenated and energised with bright, glowing skin and a new relationship with food. In reality, I feel pretty much the same and, if anything, my sweet tooth is worse now than it was before.
Maybe I would have had more noticeable results if I’d tried a five day juice cleanse instead. A lot of people say the benefits of a juice cleanse don’t really kick in until day four, but, while I could deal with the hunger and even the extreme exhaustion, I didn’t want to put my body through that kind of stress. After all, (muffin top aside) I don’t really have enough fat for my body to sustain itself for five days in a healthy way. I tried my best to stick to fruits and veggies for the two days following the cleanse, but even that was too much for me. By the second day I thought I’d pass out and had to stuff myself full of carbs (sure a veggie burger with a side of fries wasn’t the best option, but hey).
As for my stomach, it was definitely flatter…until I started eating solid foods. I think it might actually be more bloated now than it was before I started all of this.
Maybe the benefits of a juice cleanse are more noticeable in people with greater health issues or more unhealthy lifestyles than mine. Then again, maybe all those vitamins have done me a world of good on the inside without me even noticing. I wouldn’t rule out doing another juice cleanse, but for now I’m happy sticking to solid food.
